Forrest Gets Mail – 7


This is the seventh installment of the ways in which searchers…and others…communicate with Forrest and visa versa. You may have read one or two of these elsewhere. I think there is useful information in these notes…

As in the previous email pages, the notes both to and from Forrest have sometimes been edited for brevity’s sake. Names have been changed, but the humor and confusion have been left intact…

How would you like to receive a few hundred of these in a day?…


Will you talk to someone that solved your poem before they go get it.And by talk I mean explain why there but they would tell you where since your memory is fading Forrest Fenn

My memory is fading so fast I don’t remember what you said. Can you tell me again please. f


Dear Mr. Fenn,
How are you Sir? My adventure to seek the hidden treasure will begin very soon. Before I begin my adventure, I have two questions for you. How will the location of the treasure chest remain a secret if it’s also your final resting place? One cannot take one to the resting place if one has passed. Can one find the general location of the treasure just by studying the poem and reading your books without ever been to the Rocky’s?
Looking forward to your wise response. Thank you.

You underestimate me sir. f


Can I email you where treasure is? I know.

Yes, but why don’t you just go get it and then we can talk? f


How often do you check it?   I’ll be going to the destination to claim the elusive prize on Wednesday.  I’m leaving here in the morning and should be there before sunset.  Please be sure to check your mail before retiring for the night on Wednesday. Please mark my words.  On Wednesday everyone can cease their searches.  It will be done.

How fast do you plan to drive sir? Please fasten your seatbelt securely. f



My brother and I have recently begun our search for your treasure. We
believe we know where it is, but we are nervous to look as we believe it
would be illegal to dig here. Im assuming that might be why its no place for
the meak 🙂 What would you say if we said it was buried somewhere under this
square of dirt?:

I wouldn’t say anything Mitch. f


(This response from Forrest was to a woman who planned to ask me to accompany her on her search in bear country.)
If you want Dal to accompany you on your search in griz country you should contact him directly. But beware for three reasons:
1.   He’s a coward when it comes to sacrificing his life for two beautiful women.
2.   He suffers from grizzlitis, which is incurable.
3.   He can out run you.
Good luck in the hunt. f


I will find your treasure or die trying.

Where would you like me to send flowers? f


If I might be so bold as to humbly implore your aid.  I am pursuing direction with regard to a certain work.  If  you would be able to assist, guide, or direct me with the following question, I would be forever temporally grateful.
Question: When the “Sun” and the “Moon” are in their prime, does one join them in the “secret fire of the sages” or under the external influence of Vulcan?

Thank you for being forever temporally grateful. Both the sun and moon are past their prime so I think your soomonna should be allocated with mykanther riggens to effect maximum alkabate, otherwise the third sedentary might implure your aggrabate. What do you think? f


I would like to know how you came into your wealth, and how you find the
time to write books. People’s stories are always interesting and inspiring
to me, and I’d very much like to hear your story – provided you have time to
share it with me!

I was successful because I took the time to sit down for a few minutes each day and think. Try that and see if it will work for you. f


(This is a question from a TV reporter who’s story already aired. The day after it’s airing she followed up with an important question about information she got wrong in the story.}
I should have asked yesterday: have you said the treasure is buried in New Mexico?

I have never said the treasure was buried, I said it was hidden, I didn’t want to give that as a clue. I have not said it was in New Mexico. I only said it was in the Rocky Mountains north of Santa Fe.  f


I am a very meek person not to mention out of shape. I will always muster all the strenght and courage I have in order to go in there. to be honest I am scared to death. But it is part of the solution so I have no choice but to do it to get your treasure chest.

Please don’t look for the treasure in a place where a 79 or 80 year old man could not have hidden it. Be safe please. f


sr if it wouldn’t be to much to ask could you tell me what month you hid it so when I go the water is gone thank you for your time

I don’t remember what year it was, much less the month. Sorry. f


I Solved the riddle,  And do not know whom to contact.

Contact your banker and the IRS. f



94 thoughts on “Forrest Gets Mail – 7

  1. These emails really put a smile on my face.
    Thanks for helping to make my day!

    Like I have always said “Who has more fun than people!”


    • “Forrest,
      How often do you check it? I’ll be going to the destination to claim the elusive prize on Wednesday. I’m leaving here in the morning and should be there before sunset. Please be sure to check your mail before retiring for the night on Wednesday. Please mark my words. On Wednesday everyone can cease their searches. It will be done.

      How fast do you plan to drive sir? Please fasten your seatbelt securely. f”

      Pretty sure this one is Kevin

  2. Good gods this are hilarious! Airman Fenn is such a wit. And I’m glad to read Dal can outrun two beautiful women, though a REAL MAN would tackle the grizzly in a momentary and very brief fit of irrationally to prove his reproductive fitness.

    • Like the guy who punched the bear in the face to protect his tiny dog, DP?

      Forrest hears some of the funniest stuff. Thanks Forrest! 🙂

      • That was my neighbor Deb! Maybe I should ask him to come on my next trip to YNP, then I won’t have to ask Dal to come with me like the 2 ladies did! 🙂

        These emails are hilarious!

    • Desertphile-
      I am 67. I don’t have any more brief fits of reproductive fitness. Such a thing could give me a heart attack…or cause my hair to fall out. But I can still run. 🙂

      • Lol, I listen good to my elders and betters. Please, please DaL, tell me reproductive fitness does not stop in the sixties. 🙂

      • Well golly, I’m so very sad to hear that. I’m 55, and when I feel the urge for being reproductively fit in the Darwinian sense, I reach for a fork and reheat the left over pie. It’s so much less work.

        • That might be because your ranch is farther from civilization than a solar flare…
          You make your own wine and use a cattle drinking trough for a bathtub…
          I think you need to get out more Desertphile..
          Actually..the pie idea sounds pretty good 🙂

          Fennboree is just a tad more than two weeks away…

      • Hubby say to tell you he is 66 and it helps to marry a lady 10 yrs younger than you. and if your hair falls out WHO CARE!

  3. Hats off to you Forrest. Dodging weasels and ferrets along the path of literacy.
    Thanks for the smiles Forrest, Dal.

  4. I bet Forrest get many emails from people saying they know where the treasure is…..That is funny forrest…He said “go get it than we can talk”. Forrest is a RIOT…..
    Forrest I have a question. DId you get your humor from your Mother or Your Father? Or someone else?. Or from the School of Funny Bone?

    Lou Lee Belle…..Rock On!

    • I wonder if it was an event in which Forrest realized that there was a different way of looking at things.

  5. Is the third sedentary maximum alkabate here already?! Dang, how time flies.

    • Well I’ll be darned it really did have something to do with the coriolis effect; I’ve just about got the soomonna and mykanther riggens calculations worked out. The wife is making me a sandwich to take with me……….Get in the truck Lucy, lets go get that chest.

  6. I’d once found a blaze on a boulder. When I looked beneath it there was a niche just big enough to hide the chest. But the hiding place was empty. So I took a picture of it and emailed FF to ask if that had been the blaze and hiding place. I got no response.
    I should have known that ff would not have left his bones in a tiny hole under a rock in a public park.

    • Fortunately or unfortunately, depending upon one’s perspective, there are many tens of thousands of rocks with blazes with fissures and cavities in them scattered throughout the Rocky Mountains. If I recall correctly gmail doesn’t automatically retrieve images so perhaps Airman Fenn didn’t see your picture.

  7. Fenn, I’ve got a confession to make. Dal really doesn’t have grizzlitis…….It’s the bear pheromones I’ve been spraying in Esmeralda for years that makes him smell that way.

  8. I just got caught driving under the influence of Vulcan. I blew 1200 degrees f.

  9. Well Goofy,

    Appears my rush to judgement of Mr. P was incorrect and I apologize to Kevin and all for any confusion or finger pointing in my comments. I say this after reading mail sent to f and reading the 4th message. Sounds very much like our Kevin.

    • You’re right uken2it, that does sound like Kevin; bless his heart. There’s probably hundreds of Kevin’s out there every week we don’t hear about, making a mad dash to get the gold before anyone else does.

      • Bless His Heart?? OMG lol When I came here in October last year and gave everyone 8 months notice that it would be over and I’d go get it…. You wanted me to get eaten by a Grizzly or jump off a cliff! 😛 This guy gives everyone a ONE DAY notice and you are blessing the guy! That comparison has stumped me 😐

        • Well Iron, listening to a gold dazed genius for one day is one thing, and he did break down and say “in his opinion”.

          But having to listen to his pompous declarations for eight months is more torture than any human should have to bear.

        • Too funny …
          Bless your heart.

          Anyone want to take this or should we just let him guess?


        • i wasnt on the blog then. if i had been here i wouldnt want you to get eatten by a bear because the bear didnt do anything. just kidding. we are blessing him in his foolliness

    • Hello, Pirate. Could I kindly request two buccaneers, please? I figure I’ll hear better with a fresh set. I left my other two under my buccan-hat!

  10. Thanks Forrest and Dal for this delightfully humorous look at my competition…

  11. These are some of my favorite post, very funny!

    POG, I’d like to be an honorary buccaneer, but I ain’t got that kinda a mean… Hey POG did anyone every find the treasure you hid?
    Mark H.

  12. The comments are funnier than the emails tonight! Thanks my favorite group!

  13. Anyone know where Kevin P is heading for his solve?, what State?, Sounds like some of ya’ll know more about him than me.. I would be crushed if this guy found it and I was about to head out soon myself…Ouch…But hey I guess that will happen one day..

  14. Well, if Kevin was able to keep his schedule then he should be at his location.

  15. When I go in the summer. I’m gonna send you a picture. Please check your mail daily. I am confident,yes I am. Very confident. Three strike,s and I’m out of the wet cave and jumping the boulder,s..laughing out loudly. 🙂 Don’t forget now. Tie that knot on your finger so you don’t forget to check.:) I hope I don’t run into Dal. I don’t want his grizzlitis to worsen my thrillitis arthritis.:)

  16. And here’s your SIGN ……. For all those who asked those questions 🙂

    Forrest answered them all correctly and clever 🙂 never ask a man who hid a chest where it is. Well in some cases I guess it doesn’t hurt to ask 😉

  17. good grieve,it rained cats and dogs here in arvada this evening,never seen such rain like that since I used to live in san Antonio,texas.been in Colorado since 1977,never have I seen it rain like that.oh did I giggle at those things people write to mr. fenn.on some of them all you got to say is ,well bless their little heart.they just couldn’t help it.Hi , mr. forrest.

  18. Some of ff’s answers to email’s he receives sound like they came from the lips of Samuel Clemens: Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.
    Mark Twain….So many books and so little time!


    Trivia both Mark Twain and Molly Brown were born in Hannibal, Mo, exactly 90 miles north of the starting point of the Old Santa Fe Trail.

      • Dal, you missed alot of laughs searching with us in beautiful Montana, some good food, a chance at seeing the most accurate solution to date, and 32 head of moose. 85% of this is true.

  19. This question has likely been asked before but are there any known typo’s in the book Thrill of the Chase? Thank you.

  20. How often does Forrest take to reply to emails? I know he’s busy and the time between varies but on average how often does it take?

  21. Mr. Fenn, I have a question. Did you leave your personal contact information in the chest so the person who finds the treasure can contact you privately without going public? 🙂 Thanks. – CB

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